If you know me, you will know that I have spent significant years in the corporate world where feedback is considered the golden opportunity for improvement. It’s a tool for growth, and it’s a mirror reflecting our strengths and challenges. So… what if we applied this principle to our most important role – parenting? While the dynamics are different, the concept of seeking feedback from our kids can be transformative. Let’s borrow a page from the corporate handbook and explore this idea at home. Here are some helpful tips:

Create a safe space: Just as in the workplace, setting the right environment is crucial for candid feedback. Choose a time when you and your child can sit down without distractions. Reassure them that this is a safe space where their opinions are valued and won’t result in negative consequences. For me and my child, this is usually bedtime.

The Art of Asking: Pose questions that prompt thoughtful responses. Instead of a generic “How am I doing as a parent?” consider asking more specific questions like, “What’s something I do that makes you feel supported?” or “If there is something you wish I did differently, what would it be?

Active Listening: Once you’ve initiated the conversation, practice active listening. Resist the urge to interrupt or defend yourself. Give your child the space to express their thoughts and feelings. This is about understanding their perspective, not debating it.

No Rebuttal Zone: In the corporate world, we’re meant to suppress the urge to immediately respond to feedback. Let’s apply the same principle here. Even if the feedback stings or surprises you, resist the temptation to rebut. This isn’t a debate; it’s an opportunity for self-reflection.

Encourage Specificity: To make the feedback more actionable, encourage your child to provide specific examples. Instead of a vague “You’re always busy,” ask for instances when they felt you were too preoccupied. Concrete examples help you pinpoint areas for improvement.

Express your Gratitude: This was probably hard for your child, thank them for their courage and honesty. This sets the tone for an ongoing open dialog about your parenting.

Take Action: Use the feedback to guide change. If there are specific behaviors or actions your child wishes were different, make a genuine effort to adjust. This demonstrates to your child that their input is not only heard but acted upon.

Regular Check-Ins: Integrate feedback into your parenting journey and schedule periodic check-ins. This dialog creates trust and ensures you remain attuned with your child’s needs.

It’s my belief that applying this corporate tool can be equally transformative in the realm of parenting. Embrace the opportunity to learn from your child; their perspective is a valuable guide on your journey as a parent. By fostering open communication, you create a family dynamic built on trust, understanding, and a shared commitment to continuous improvement.